"Raise the lifeless
Die to fight this
Stand beside me
Storm the gates of Hell"
-Demon Hunter
As one who derives joy from pain, lets remember one thing: I'm not seriously a masochist.
I think I would call it dedicated.
I got poison ivy, and, instead of wallowing and waiting it out, I decided to fight back. Yeah! So, thinking about all the functions of the body in my "how things work" mentality, I undermined the best way to rid myself of poison ivy: "Let it all out, Get it all out, Rip it out, Remove it. Don't be alarmed when the wound begins to bleed"
I found a razor and began shaving at all the bumps. Then, I followed up with bleach. Ah, delicious bleach. Applications never were more fun. This is where the masochism / dedication clash. See, I enjoy the pain - why? Because I know that it is healing me. I know that I am getting rid of the bad, making way for the good. I think that it is perfectly fine to endure pain with joy, knowing the outcome. When you put alcohol on an open wound, it's pro's outweigh the con's.
Thinking in the mindset of a Christ follower, then, would it not be best to endure the pain of [this world] with the knowledge of the [world to come]?
Do the right things. Whats the worst that could happen?
(Little shout out to Heidi on the "living dangerous" thing)
I love the words to that song (and the music / vocals [screams, rather] aren't too bad) "Die to fight this." Can you really say you would?
I, being a male, am into the violence and stuff. I remember telling mom about how I wish there was just an enemy. One thing, that we could see, and rally against, and defeat. Something tangible. Something that can be, at once, up, then fall because of our determination.
Then Jesus has to go with the whole, "Turn the other cheek" - basically "We don't roll that way anymore. The times of giant wars are over - no more physical enemies, only invisible and enacting enemies" (we don't fight flesh and blood, but powers and principalities, anyone?)
So what is left for us, who are so aggressive? Pray with veins coming out of your face? Really dig in and write that letter to the government? God, we've become so lame in our wars.. How does one actually rid oneself of the urges that God instinctively designed him to feel?
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Servant
I'll start with a line or two from Demon Hunter:
"I need a heart
that carries on through the pain
When the walls start collapsing again.
Give me a soul
that never ceases to follow,
Despite the infection within"
-Deteriorate
I've talked about a day to just rest before, and I really think it is important enough to say so here. I mowed the grass today. That seems like little, and rather it also seems like a requirement, and thats exactly what I'm getting at. I absolutely despise using the typical methods of biblical relation, so I'm gonna put it into story mode and we'll all be happy.
So there was this family - ok, so it was a huge family. Not what we know of in America - probably not one that we've ever seen other than this one time in history. This family was enormous: thousands of people living in one place. They were outcasts, the dirt of the earth, the slaves of a conglomerate. Every thing they did was under the watch of someone else who had no pity on them, and more likely had hatred by default for them. This family was forced into hard physical labor, the kind of stuff we see now in Africa (where people must work the full extent of their life to pay off an incredibly small debt). They had to labor in the heat, every day, all day, and were given very little comforts, very few means of survival beyond the basics to keep breathing. Old and young alike, the cruelty was unrivaled.
This is wrong.
How do you know it's wrong? Is it because there is cruelty? Is it because they must work without breaks or vacations?
What if we rearranged the story just a tad.. Lets say these people were simply highly ambitious. They worked every day because they wanted to build the most amazing resume, or construct the largest monument (to... themselves?)
Is that wrong?
Some might say, "What's wrong with ambition? If someone can out-play the next player, then more power to him" right? Now, I have to quote some bible here, but meh..
This family was eventually set free. Yeah, completely free. It was such a massive ordeal that there were books and stories and songs and plays and monuments built for hundreds and hundreds of years. This was a BIG deal. No longer were they under a heavy, immovable tyrant of injustice. They were completely free.
Upon their freedom, they are given a few things to do - not like a checklist, but a "do unto others" kind of thing. At that point, God was showing himself to this family through a couple dudes. These men were "made as God to pharaoh." They showed the compassion that God has for His people, and then the massive amounts of annoying things God can do to people who don't like His people.
In the next chapter of the lives of this family, they were taken to a mountain and told how to be like God to the rest of the world - along with being told to actually DO those things.
Heres the part which is amazing: God actually said to them (in my paraphrase) "Look at yourself. You worked every day of your life. No more. When I made the world, I even took a day off. I am giving you a FREE DAY - realize that you are NOT a machine, you are NOT made solely for work. You were made for so much more... TAKE the time to NOT do something, no matter how hard it is"
My day is Thursday. I usually plan on having dinner with someone, or maybe going to get bread. I have vowed to refuse being forced into service on Thursdays. There is nothing that says I won't relax on other days, or that I won't help out in an emergency on a Thursday, but when it comes to planning stuff, I stick to planning people time, time to increase my love. Time to recoup and prepare for the weekend. Time to think about my life. Time...
So may you come to a place where you can throw aside all the "have to's" and relax for a day - yes, people will say you are lazy, but God designed you for it: take it!
"I need a heart
that carries on through the pain
When the walls start collapsing again.
Give me a soul
that never ceases to follow,
Despite the infection within"
-Deteriorate
I've talked about a day to just rest before, and I really think it is important enough to say so here. I mowed the grass today. That seems like little, and rather it also seems like a requirement, and thats exactly what I'm getting at. I absolutely despise using the typical methods of biblical relation, so I'm gonna put it into story mode and we'll all be happy.
So there was this family - ok, so it was a huge family. Not what we know of in America - probably not one that we've ever seen other than this one time in history. This family was enormous: thousands of people living in one place. They were outcasts, the dirt of the earth, the slaves of a conglomerate. Every thing they did was under the watch of someone else who had no pity on them, and more likely had hatred by default for them. This family was forced into hard physical labor, the kind of stuff we see now in Africa (where people must work the full extent of their life to pay off an incredibly small debt). They had to labor in the heat, every day, all day, and were given very little comforts, very few means of survival beyond the basics to keep breathing. Old and young alike, the cruelty was unrivaled.
This is wrong.
How do you know it's wrong? Is it because there is cruelty? Is it because they must work without breaks or vacations?
What if we rearranged the story just a tad.. Lets say these people were simply highly ambitious. They worked every day because they wanted to build the most amazing resume, or construct the largest monument (to... themselves?)
Is that wrong?
Some might say, "What's wrong with ambition? If someone can out-play the next player, then more power to him" right? Now, I have to quote some bible here, but meh..
This family was eventually set free. Yeah, completely free. It was such a massive ordeal that there were books and stories and songs and plays and monuments built for hundreds and hundreds of years. This was a BIG deal. No longer were they under a heavy, immovable tyrant of injustice. They were completely free.
Upon their freedom, they are given a few things to do - not like a checklist, but a "do unto others" kind of thing. At that point, God was showing himself to this family through a couple dudes. These men were "made as God to pharaoh." They showed the compassion that God has for His people, and then the massive amounts of annoying things God can do to people who don't like His people.
In the next chapter of the lives of this family, they were taken to a mountain and told how to be like God to the rest of the world - along with being told to actually DO those things.
Heres the part which is amazing: God actually said to them (in my paraphrase) "Look at yourself. You worked every day of your life. No more. When I made the world, I even took a day off. I am giving you a FREE DAY - realize that you are NOT a machine, you are NOT made solely for work. You were made for so much more... TAKE the time to NOT do something, no matter how hard it is"
My day is Thursday. I usually plan on having dinner with someone, or maybe going to get bread. I have vowed to refuse being forced into service on Thursdays. There is nothing that says I won't relax on other days, or that I won't help out in an emergency on a Thursday, but when it comes to planning stuff, I stick to planning people time, time to increase my love. Time to recoup and prepare for the weekend. Time to think about my life. Time...
So may you come to a place where you can throw aside all the "have to's" and relax for a day - yes, people will say you are lazy, but God designed you for it: take it!
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
King Itchy
Quite a normal day.
I had the chance to play drums today, with no one around. I like the freedom. Joel had said that I need to "grow some" cause I was pretty weak on Sunday. I completely understand where he's coming from. The only defense I have is purely this: it's Sunday morning, and old people. Not to be hatin' on tha playas, but they be old, yo. Old people don't seem to like when young people play their loud music and wear weird clothes. But my intentions aren't even in that range. To present it from the "doe-eyed Bambi watching his mother get shot and strapped to the back of a van" perspective, I've been (or seen others in my position) chastised for playing freely. Its worship for crying out loud! I understand that theres a certain amount of conformity needed in order to create an atmosphere, but honestly, who is it for? What ranks in more importance? Lets have some option, and sit in front of each other, giving our justification for picking option A vs B. Who is it for?
I remember thinking about how rude it was when people would open their eyes during prayers. Or when someone didn't know that a group was praying, and you felt the need to quietly gesture to them to be quiet while the prayer was finished. What a bunch of lame crap. Who cares? Aren't Christ followers supposed to "pray without ceasing" anyway? What makes the difference if one person interrupts a whole 30 seconds of ONE prayer out of the whole rest of your life?
The same with worship time. I thought it was absolutely a bad thing if something happened NOT according to schedule or just not usual to our typical stuff. And for what? Who is it for? Let's imagine that someone comes in asking for something to eat. What if someone died in the service? Imagine a demonic inhabitant of some sort making a huge scene. Imagine the power going out. Imagine if the chairs all collapsed. Imagine having the building caught on fire. Imagine a plane or car crash nearby.
So it might be easy in some of those cases to say, "Well of course I'd stop and help." - but wouldn't you feel as though you weren't holy enough afterward?
What if you missed church one week? OMG.
What if a friend missed church one week? Not so bad?
What if church wasn't observed one week? Move on?
What if you weren't allowed to meet in public, legally?
What if people talk during the sermon?
What if people leave during the sermon?
What if people are mean to you because you won't spend time with them on Sunday morning because you have to be at a religious event?
What if the average church meeting moved to Saturday night? Saturday morning? Friday night?
During worship, think about yourself. Who are you presenting your body to? Who are you giving adoration? Who are you focusing on? This is NOT one of those "OK kids, it's time to learn how to worship without feeling like everyone is watching you, cause its all for God anyway" things. Everyone IS watching you. Everyone IS scrutinizing you. WHO CARES? If you are as crazy in love with God as you label yourself, then I WANT to see it, cause that means its possible.
I don't believe in labeling things as "Christian" because it's a synonym for "safe".
I don't believe in 'blessing the food' immediately before eating it.
I don't believe that God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, or any patriarch, ever intended for Christ / God-followers / obeyers to meet systematically.
When will the American 'church' start acting like the freakin church already?
When is the Kingdom of God going to be realized as not after death and the end of the world but RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW?
When are you, yes you, reader, going to give your life to something other than yourself? That line is taken such as cliche, maybe even passed over so simply, but think about it. When will you devote every ounce of your existence, your thought process, your muscles, your love, your emotions, your money, your time, your effort..
If "Christians" don't start acting like Christians, I say kick them out.
It's rough life. It's time some people started taking it seriously, cause so far it's been a joke
I had the chance to play drums today, with no one around. I like the freedom. Joel had said that I need to "grow some" cause I was pretty weak on Sunday. I completely understand where he's coming from. The only defense I have is purely this: it's Sunday morning, and old people. Not to be hatin' on tha playas, but they be old, yo. Old people don't seem to like when young people play their loud music and wear weird clothes. But my intentions aren't even in that range. To present it from the "doe-eyed Bambi watching his mother get shot and strapped to the back of a van" perspective, I've been (or seen others in my position) chastised for playing freely. Its worship for crying out loud! I understand that theres a certain amount of conformity needed in order to create an atmosphere, but honestly, who is it for? What ranks in more importance? Lets have some option, and sit in front of each other, giving our justification for picking option A vs B. Who is it for?
I remember thinking about how rude it was when people would open their eyes during prayers. Or when someone didn't know that a group was praying, and you felt the need to quietly gesture to them to be quiet while the prayer was finished. What a bunch of lame crap. Who cares? Aren't Christ followers supposed to "pray without ceasing" anyway? What makes the difference if one person interrupts a whole 30 seconds of ONE prayer out of the whole rest of your life?
The same with worship time. I thought it was absolutely a bad thing if something happened NOT according to schedule or just not usual to our typical stuff. And for what? Who is it for? Let's imagine that someone comes in asking for something to eat. What if someone died in the service? Imagine a demonic inhabitant of some sort making a huge scene. Imagine the power going out. Imagine if the chairs all collapsed. Imagine having the building caught on fire. Imagine a plane or car crash nearby.
So it might be easy in some of those cases to say, "Well of course I'd stop and help." - but wouldn't you feel as though you weren't holy enough afterward?
What if you missed church one week? OMG.
What if a friend missed church one week? Not so bad?
What if church wasn't observed one week? Move on?
What if you weren't allowed to meet in public, legally?
What if people talk during the sermon?
What if people leave during the sermon?
What if people are mean to you because you won't spend time with them on Sunday morning because you have to be at a religious event?
What if the average church meeting moved to Saturday night? Saturday morning? Friday night?
During worship, think about yourself. Who are you presenting your body to? Who are you giving adoration? Who are you focusing on? This is NOT one of those "OK kids, it's time to learn how to worship without feeling like everyone is watching you, cause its all for God anyway" things. Everyone IS watching you. Everyone IS scrutinizing you. WHO CARES? If you are as crazy in love with God as you label yourself, then I WANT to see it, cause that means its possible.
I don't believe in labeling things as "Christian" because it's a synonym for "safe".
I don't believe in 'blessing the food' immediately before eating it.
I don't believe that God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, or any patriarch, ever intended for Christ / God-followers / obeyers to meet systematically.
When will the American 'church' start acting like the freakin church already?
When is the Kingdom of God going to be realized as not after death and the end of the world but RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW?
When are you, yes you, reader, going to give your life to something other than yourself? That line is taken such as cliche, maybe even passed over so simply, but think about it. When will you devote every ounce of your existence, your thought process, your muscles, your love, your emotions, your money, your time, your effort..
If "Christians" don't start acting like Christians, I say kick them out.
It's rough life. It's time some people started taking it seriously, cause so far it's been a joke
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Come and See / True love
Alicia asked if I had a blog, and I kinda did / do, but now it's official and Sarah and Heidi can follow me and vice versa.
I've been drastically pulled to the sounds of The Decemberists for quite some time now. Thanks to Jason. Just about every song I hear from them has been perfection, or at least just right for my listening ears.
So I love music. Love. I was thinking about that thing I read or heard or something.. from someone.. about how we overuse (and misuse) the word "love" in English. I guess, from what I know, that there are multiple ways of expressing joy or gratitude for things and people and stuffs and events and items.. in other languages, so that they don't use the word "love" for anything other than intimacy. I've been practicing not using it in any way that would detract from its personality, which is intimacy. So, I love music. It's not just a saying. It's not just something I quoted. It's a connection I feel. It's a connection that, without it, would leave me withered and isolated, unsure of purpose and direction. Oh, what a gracious gift from God it is...
I've been drastically pulled to the sounds of The Decemberists for quite some time now. Thanks to Jason. Just about every song I hear from them has been perfection, or at least just right for my listening ears.
So I love music. Love. I was thinking about that thing I read or heard or something.. from someone.. about how we overuse (and misuse) the word "love" in English. I guess, from what I know, that there are multiple ways of expressing joy or gratitude for things and people and stuffs and events and items.. in other languages, so that they don't use the word "love" for anything other than intimacy. I've been practicing not using it in any way that would detract from its personality, which is intimacy. So, I love music. It's not just a saying. It's not just something I quoted. It's a connection I feel. It's a connection that, without it, would leave me withered and isolated, unsure of purpose and direction. Oh, what a gracious gift from God it is...
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